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  • Dear cats and dogs...

    Dear Dogs and Cats,

  • #2
    Re: Dear cats and dogs...

    Originally posted by kerryclair
    Dear Dogs and Cats,
    <All sitting at attention with ears standing up & whiskers at attention>
    Juanita (& the kids - Missy, Taffy, Smudge & Marmie)

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    • #3
      LOL!
      OOPS!!
      Forgot the rest!!
      HAHAHAHAHA!
      Thanks Juanita, here is the rest:

      ----------------------------------------

      > Dear Dogs and Cats,
      >
      > When I say to move, it means go someplace else, not to switch
      > positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.
      >
      > The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The
      > other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw
      > print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it
      > becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing
      > in the slightest.
      >
      > The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.
      > Beating me to the bottom is not the objective. Tripping me doesn't
      > help because I can fall faster than you can run.
      >
      > I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry
      > about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to
      > ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats actually curl up in a ball when
      > they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other
      > stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that
      > sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other
      > end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
      >
      > For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by
      > some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is
      > not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your
      > paw
      > under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the
      > same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --
      > canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.
      >
      > The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's
      > behind.
      > I cannot stress this enough!
      >
      > To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our
      > front door.
      >
      > Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain A bout Our
      > Pets:
      >
      > 1. They live here. You don't.
      >
      > 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the
      > furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
      >
      > 3. I like my pets a lot better than most people.
      >
      > 4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter
      > who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
      > Dogs and cats are better than kids ... they eat less, don't ask for
      > money all the time, and are easier to train, usually come when called,
      > never drive your car, don't hang out with drug-using friends, don't
      > smoke or drink, don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions,
      > don't wear your clothes, and don't need a gazillion dollars for
      > college - and if they get pregnant, you can sell the children.

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      • #4
        LOL!

        I've seen this one before. It's a definite keeper! And so on target. :wink:
        Juanita (& the kids - Missy, Taffy, Smudge & Marmie)

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        • #5
          I feel the same way when my friends say that my turtles look ugly!
          Animals always become best friends.

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          • #6
            Funny and cute! (Except for the selling children part, which I am against, but other than that, I love it!)

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            • #7
              Haha, that was great. I think my cats would like it if I posted that on our door. :D
              *Amanda*
              My Family: 3 Kittens, 2 Cats (not including my beloved strays), 20 Fish, 6 Betta Fish, two mice, and two hamsters. And all is well. :-D

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              • #8
                Yes I have seen this one before too!! lol I actually had a copy of it (the part where you say "rules for non-pet owners....)printed out and taped to the wall near the entrance of my place!!! lol...I just love it!!!
                I Love My Valentine Rottie!!!!

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                • #9
                  Rules what rules?

                  I've always loved this one. A friend sent it to me years ago.
                  Jan

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                  • #10
                    I'm going to send this one to some of my friends through e-mail... lmao, it's hilarious!

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                    • #11
                      I'm going to send this one to some of my friends through e-mail... lmao, it's hilarious!

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                      • #12
                        ROFL!!! My kitchen is in the process of being remodeled and now that it's down to just the final clean up, I realize my walls are really bare (I had one of those kitchens lined from floor to ceiling, 3 solid walls, of pure cupboards--not enough income to fill them all so I took some out). Anyway. So my walls need some "sprucing" up. Considering there is one spot for all the dog dishes, water bucket, cat food, etc, etc, etc I may just print this out and frame it.

                        That's too funny!

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                        • #13
                          LOL! Wahahaha...
                          [url=http://www.petsupplyonlinestore.com]pet supply and accessory[/url]

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